Held by the Sea

Depth Training, March 2025

I didn’t expect to enjoy freediving as much as I did. Aiman introduced me to it. He has always loved the ocean, and I just wanted to try something he enjoyed. I thought I’d feel nervous or out of place, but it actually felt natural to me from the start.

Maybe it’s because I used to take swimming classes when I was younger. My body was already familiar with the water. I even remember practicing “drowning” scenarios back then pretending someone would come help me. LOL. It sounds strange, but maybe that taught my body how to stay calm.

Freediving brought back that calm. When I went under, I didn’t feel fear. Just quiet. Just space. I was surprised by how my body just knew how to move and float.

But while I felt steady, I also witnessed how serious freediving can be. I saw someone get a bad cramp underwater. Another person got disoriented and didn’t know which way was up. Someone else nearly blacked out. Watching those moments reminded me how important it is to stay present and to never underestimate the ocean.

All the breathwork I had done during past panic attacks helped me. I found myself using those same grounding techniques underwater—slow, intentional breathing before the dive, staying centered when coming up.

Freediving isn’t just about the water. It’s about trust. Listening to your body. Letting go, but also staying aware. I didn’t expect it to become something I love, but it did. Now I can’t imagine not returning to it. Alhamdulillah.